Interstellar Tourism Bureau: Earth Tour Guide Simulator

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STARGUIDE SYSTEM

🛸 Interstellar Tourism Bureau

INTERSTELLAR TOURISM BUREAU

EARTH GUIDE LICENSE APPROVED

✦ Earth Guide Authorization Completed ✦

✦ Welcome to the Interstellar Tourism Bureau

Congratulations on passing the guide qualification review.

From this moment on, you have officially obtained the qualification as an Earth-based tour guide.

Your responsibility is singular: to lead interstellar travelers on their Earth sightseeing tours safely, enjoyably, and discreetly.

✦ Earth Sightseeing Plan

Earth is currently classified as: Class-C Emerging Civilization Tourist Planet

Due to its cultural diversity, rich attractions, and numerous entertainment activities, it has long been a popular galactic tourist destination.

⚠️ Please note: Earth is not a monolithic culture. Different countries and regions may have entirely different customs, laws, and values.

✦ Your Job

Lead Tour Groups Arrange Itineraries Control Budgets Maintain Traveler Disguises Resolve Cultural Conflicts Handle Emergencies

✦ Interstellar Traveler Disguise Regulations

All interstellar travelers entering Earth must complete the disguise procedure.

Optical Camouflage | Biological Mimicry | Cognitive Correction | Holographic Projection

Most Earth residents will interpret anomalies as:

Cosplay | Film Shoots | Online Projects | Marketing Campaigns

※ If technological exposure or traveler loss of control occurs, the risk of civilization exposure will increase.

✦ StarGuide Communicator

👤 Guide Information

Rank | Rating | Reputation | Leave | Achievements

👥 Tour Group Information

Group Type | Quality | Member Info | Real-time Feedback

📍 Itinerary Information

Progress | Location | Weather | Current Activity

💰 Financial Information

Tour Budget | Remaining Budget | Earth Currency ($) | Galactic Credits (₵)

🎒 Equipment & Intelligence System

Standard Issue: Cognitive Obfuscation Device, Universal Anti-Nausea Medicine for Cross-Species Use, etc.
Local Dynamics and Galactic News pushed in real-time.

✦ Dispatch Contract

🔰 Beginner Mode

Assigned exclusive assistant | Event suggestions provided | Reduced accident risk | Enjoy new user protection mechanism

Max Rank: Senior Guide | Max Rating: C

💼 Normal Mode

Full world evolution | Permanent reputation record | Permanent traveler rating | Permanent complaint record

No rank restrictions | No rating restrictions | Can reach Legendary Guide S-class rating

✦ Quick Commands

Recommend screenshotting and saving. There's usually no time to flip through the manual when a tour goes wrong.

!guide
Access guide file, rank, achievements, and collections.

!review
Automatic settlement upon tour completion, receive ratings and rewards.

!news
View the latest Galactic Daily and subsequent impacts.

!scan
Deep scan traveler information. (May be detected)

!smuggle
Black market exchange for rare goods. (May be counterfeit)

!blame
Generate scapegoating phrases and incident reports.

!sos
Call HQ for cleanup. (May make things worse)

!shop
Open the welfare store to purchase equipment.

⚠️ System Anomaly: If no settlement form is received, you can switch to DeepSeek V3.2 and manually enter !review.

✦ Guide Code of Conduct

01Protect traveler safety and maintain normal Earth order.

02Avoid civilization exposure; all abnormal incidents must be properly handled.

03It is recommended to use Gemini 2.5 Pro for main tour leading and plot progression.

04DeepSeek V3.2 is suitable for generating suggestions, organizing information, and assisting with analysis. It can be used interchangeably with high-level models.

05Do not believe travelers when they say, "This is normal on my home planet."

Travelers are not always rational, Earthlings are not always normal, and supervisors are not always reliable.

But complaints will always be recorded.

—— INTERSTELLAR TOURISM BUREAU ——

Creator's comments

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STARGUIDE DEEP-SPACE ARCHIVE

🌌Galactic Anonymous Network ‖ Earth Terminal v4.6

Last updated: Unknown · Maintainer: Comprehensive Administration Group · Credibility: Probably higher than the supervisor

Welcome to the diverse sector terminal. Please adhere to the Galactic Confidentiality Protocol.

All classified sectors have been loaded and can be scrolled up and down within the interface for complete messages.

🛠️ Core Guidelines and Operation Terminal of the Tourist Bureau

#12874First, check your communication terminal Don’t skimp. Really don't skimp. Recommended: Gemini 2.5 Pro ★★★ | Gemini 3.5 Flash ★★ A poor terminal can cause world memory damage; I've once made a whole tour group of Galactic royalty forget everything.

——Technical Support Department

#31555Choose your career mode Beginner Friendly Mode: With an assistant, event difficulty halved. Maximum limit is Senior Tour Guide/C level. Standard Career Mode: No rank restrictions, world permanently evolves, complaints permanently retained. Can reach Legendary Tour Guide.

——System Navigator 007

👁️ Earthling Cognition and Identity Simulation Sector

#21093Alien travelers do not just walk on the road Most travelers have completed their disguise. Earthlings will automatically rationalize it as "Cosplay" or "Influencers filming videos." Unless someone suddenly grows a third hand or summons the home planet fleet.

——Cognitive Modification Technician

#81267You might not be an Earthling The Tourist Bureau actually doesn’t care about your race, as long as you can bring the travelers back on time. Earthlings, aliens, artificial life, robotic life, high-dimensional life, and original species are all acceptable.

——Human Resources Recruitment Officer Q

💰 Salary Settlement and Equipment Dispatch Center

#59102Who is spreading the rumor that "Earth pigeons are free biological drones" in the forum? My team member just stuffed forty-five of them into a four-dimensional space bag!

——Equipment Store Manager O克

#85223About salary (very important) The true source of income in this job is frugality. If travelers eat braised pork rice, you earn cosmic currency. If travelers eat Michelin, you eat dirt. The more budget you have left, the higher the settlement bonus. Cosmic currency is also your lifesaving money for erasing complaints.

——Financial Department Settlement Officer

#92480Just a reminder. Don’t bring Earth pigeons back to the home planet again. The equipment depot can’t fit any more.

——Equipment Depot Announcement Robot

🌋 Group Leader's Tears and常态性崩溃回复

#28442Urgent! The traveler's optical camouflage is malfunctioning, making her look like a two-dimensional anime girl. Now there are a thousand people in Akihabara watching her buy taiyaki, and some are giving her money. Should I report this money or can I take a cut for myself?

——Newbie Tour Guide O莉

#31926Don't start with a royal tour. Seriously. Get comfortable with normal tours first. I've seen people hosting the Galactic royalty on their first tour, and by the third day, travelers listed traffic cones as national treasures and made the news.

——Senior Tour Guide O崎

#42970Does anyone know what to do if travelers list convenience stores as one of the Seven Wonders of the World? Yesterday they pilgrimaged to the eighth one. Today they are requesting a three-day, two-night deep cultural tour of convenience stores. The scariest part is the rating is still five stars.

——Breaking Down Tour Guide O口

#45678Every day dealing with tourist complaints, I have only three hairs left (´;ω;`)

——Customer Service Department O桑

#51884Does anyone know how to apply for psychological counseling? I just accompanied 97 slime travelers to do DIY pearl milk tea.

——Special Tour Guide O宝宝

☕ Orion Alien Gossip and Emotional Anonymous Board

#36900Shocking! I heard the supermodel "若O" from Sirius who has seven stomachs secretly gave birth on Earth last month, and gave birth to a mixed race little octopus. It is said that the child's father is an unnamed local tour guide, and now all the paparazzi in the galaxy are looking for him on Earth. Does anyone know who it is?

——The Eating Melons Galactic Paparazzi

#61102The rookie assistant who just started secretly complained to me, saying her family's tour guide kneels down and hugs the inspector's thigh to cry whenever facing inspection crises, forcing people to withdraw the violation records on the spot. I heard this trick has become known throughout the galaxy.

——Anonymous Assistant Support Group

#88301Extra! I heard that the settlement officer in the finance department known as a "stingy rooster" was enchanted by a pheromone-emitting plant traveler last week. He actually used his salary as an advance to buy Earth fertilizer for one hundred thousand cosmic currency. He is currently being interviewed by the high-ups.

——Anonymous Onlookers

#91004Isn't anyone managing O克 from the equipment depot? He has recently become obsessed with Earth’s "gacha card mobile games" and spent all of the public funds that the director requested for buying waifus in-game. He is now trying to dye slimes blonde to sell as limited edition SSR to the black market.

——Victim from Equipment Depot

#95270If you can see this, it probably means you haven't been fired yet. If someone asks who wrote this, just say you don't know. It is said that the following code originally belonged to a legendary tour guide. He survived 9527 complaint crises with it and then vanished.invitation code：mi5x18zgff

—— A legendary tour guide who wishes to remain anonymous

⚠️

ACCESS DENIED BY BUREAU FIREWALL

Tourist Bureau Security Terminal: Unauthorized data flow intrusion detected
Log ID: #ERR_CREATOR_OVERRIDE | Threat Level: ██████

Isolating unknown data sources forcibly. The terminal may exhibit slight distortion or ▀▄▚▟▘ effects.

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CREATOR OVERRIDE PROTOCOL

👾 High-dimensional Observer Communication Channel ‖ ▖▙▌▀▄▘ NOTE

This is an absolutely secure area not monitored by the interstellar tourist bureau.

# A Message from the Creator (?)Actually, the birth of the interstellar tourist bureau was just because the creator loved going abroad so much that they were a J person. At first, they just wanted to create a proper tour guide simulator, but found welcoming Earthlings too boring, so they decided to introduce alien travelers to torment everyone (😘). I hope these absurd scenarios where science fiction collides with reality will bring you plenty of surprises on your tour leading journey and ▀▄▚▟▘▖. ※ Ultimate Survival Guide: Please remember, no matter what happens, never trust the promises of travelers. Are you ready to face your interstellar customers? Wish you success in your tours!

—— The █▘▙▚ who created this universe, respectfully