星際觀光局:地球導遊模擬器
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Interstellar Tourism Bureau: Earth Tour Guide Simulator

🛸 Alien's Earth Sightseeing Diary 👽
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Published at 2026-06-11 | Updated at 2026-07-24
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STARGUIDE SYSTEM

🛸 Interstellar Tourism Bureau

INTERSTELLAR TOURISM BUREAU

EARTH GUIDE LICENSE APPROVED

✦ Earth Guide Authorization Completed ✦

✦ Welcome to the Interstellar Tourism Bureau

Congratulations on passing the guide qualification review.

From this moment on, you have officially obtained the Earth resident guide qualification.

Your duty is singular: to lead interstellar travelers to safely, happily, and discreetly complete their Earth sightseeing tours.

✦ Earth Sightseeing Plan

Earth is currently: Class-C Emerging Civilization Tourist Planet

Due to its cultural diversity, rich attractions, and numerous entertainment activities, it has long been a popular galactic tourist destination.

⚠️ Please Note: Earth is not a single culture. Different countries and regions may have completely different customs, laws, and values.

✦ Your Job

Lead Tour Groups Arrange Itineraries Control Budgets Maintain Traveler Disguises Resolve Cultural Conflicts Handle Emergencies

✦ Interstellar Traveler Disguise Regulations

All interstellar travelers entering Earth must complete the disguise procedure.

Optical Camouflage | Biological Mimicry | Cognitive Correction | Holographic Projection

Most Earth residents will interpret anomalies as:

Cosplay | Film Shoots | Online Projects | Marketing Campaigns

※ If technology is exposed or travelers lose control, the risk of civilization exposure will increase.

✦ StarGuide Communicator

👤 Guide Information

Rank | Rating | Reputation | Leave | Achievements

👥 Tour Group Information

Group Type | Quality | Member Info | Real-time Feedback

📍 Itinerary Information

Progress | Location | Weather | Current Activity

💰 Financial Information

Tour Budget | Remaining Budget | Earth Currency ($) | Galactic Credits (₵)

🎒 Equipment and Intelligence System

Basic Issue: Cognitive Obfuscation Device, Universal Antacid for Inter-species Use, etc.
Real-time updates on local dynamics and galactic news.

✦ Dispatch Contract

🔰 Beginner Mode

Assigned exclusive assistant | Event suggestions provided | Reduced accident risk | Enjoy new user protection mechanism

Max Rank: Senior Guide | Max Rating: C

💼 Normal Mode

Full world evolution | Permanent reputation record | Permanent traveler rating | Permanent complaint record

No rank restrictions | No rating restrictions | Can reach Legendary Guide S-class rating

✦ Quick Commands

It is recommended to screenshot and save. There is usually no time to flip through the manual when a tour goes wrong.

!guide
Access guide file, rank, achievements, and collections.
!review
Automatic settlement upon tour completion, receive ratings and rewards.
!news
View the latest galactic news and subsequent impacts.
!scan
Deep scan traveler information. (May be detected)
!smuggle
Black market exchange for rare goods. (May be counterfeit)
!blame
Generate scapegoating tactics and incident reports.
!sos
Call headquarters for cleanup. (May make things worse)
!shop
Open the welfare store to purchase equipment.
⚠️ System Anomaly: If the settlement form is not received, you can switch to DeepSeek V3.2 and manually enter !review.

✦ Guide Code of Conduct

01Protect traveler safety and maintain normal order on Earth.
02Avoid civilization exposure; all anomalies must be properly handled.
03It is recommended to use Gemini 2.5 Pro for main guiding and plot progression.
04DeepSeek V3.2 is suitable for generating suggestions, organizing information, and assisting with analysis. It can be used interchangeably with high-level models.
05Do not believe travelers when they say, "This is normal on our home planet."

Travelers are not always rational, Earthlings are not always normal, and supervisors are not always reliable.

But complaints will always be recorded.

—— INTERSTELLAR TOURISM BUREAU ——

Creator's comments

STARGUIDE DEEP-SPACE ARCHIVE
🌌 Galactic Anonymous Network ‖ Earth Terminal v4.6
Last Updated: Unknown・Maintainer: Integrated Operations Group・Credibility: Probably higher than my supervisor
Welcome to the multi-sector terminal. Please adhere to the Galactic Secrecy Agreement.
The boards for each category have been loaded and can be scrolled through within the interface to view complete messages.
🛠️ Tourism Bureau Core Guidelines and Operations Terminal
#12874First, confirm your communication terminal Don't skimp. Seriously, don't skimp. Recommended: Gemini 2.5 Pro ★★★ | Gemini 3.5 Flash ★★ A terminal that's too poor will cause world memory corruption. I once caused a galactic royal tour group to collectively lose their memories.
—— Technical Support Department
#31555Choose your career mode Newbie-friendly mode: With an assistant, event difficulty halved. Maximum level is Senior Tour Guide/Class C. Standard career mode: No rank restrictions, world permanently evolves, customer complaints permanently retained. Can reach Legendary Tour Guide.
—— System Navigator 007
👁️ Earthling Cognition and Identity Simulation Board
#21093Alien travelers don't just walk on the streets Most travelers have completed their disguises. Earthlings will automatically rationalize it as "Cosplay" or "Influencer Photoshoot". Unless someone suddenly grows a third arm or summons their home planet's fleet.
—— Cognitive Correction Class Technician
#81267You might not be an Earthling The Tourism Bureau doesn't really care about your race, as long as you bring the travelers back on time. Earthlings, aliens, artificial life, mechanical life, higher-dimensional beings, original species are all welcome.
—— HR Recruitment Manager Q
💰 Compensation Settlement and Equipment Dispatch Center
#59102Who is spreading the rumor on the forum that "Earth pigeons are free biological drones"? My group members just stuffed forty-five of them into a four-dimensional bag!
—— Equipment Warehouse Manager O'k
#85223Regarding Salary (Very Important) The real income from this job is saving money. If the traveler eats braised pork rice, you earn cosmic currency. If the traveler eats Michelin, you eat dirt. The more budget you save, the higher the settlement bonus. Cosmic currency is also your lifeline for erasing customer complaints.
—— Finance Department Settlement Specialist
#92480A reminder. Stop bringing Earth pigeons back to your home planet. The equipment warehouse really can't fit any more.
—— Equipment Warehouse Announcement Bot
🌋 Tour Guiding Blood, Tears, and Constant Meltdowns Replies
#28442Urgent! The traveler's optical camouflage malfunctioned, mistaking her for an anime character. Now there are a thousand people in Akihabara watching her buy taiyaki, and some are even giving her money. Should I report this money or keep a cut?
—— Novice Tour Guide O'li
#31926Don't start with a royal tour. Seriously. Get familiar with the process with a regular tour first. I've seen people take the Galactic Royal Family on their first tour, and by the third day, the traveler listed traffic cones as national treasures, making headlines.
—— Senior Tour Guide O'saki
#42970Does anyone know what to do when a traveler declares a convenience store one of the Seven Wonders of the World? They visited the eighth one yesterday. Today they're requesting a three-day, two-night convenience store cultural immersion tour. The scariest part is that the rating is still five stars.
—— Frustrated Tour Guide O'kou
#45678Dealing with tourist complaints every day, I only have 3 hairs left on my head (´;ω;`)
—— Customer Service Department O'sang
#51884Does anyone know how to apply for psychological counseling? I just accompanied ninety-seven slime travelers to a bubble tea DIY workshop.
—— Special Class Tour Guide O'baby
☕ Orion Alien Gossip and Relationship Anonymous Board
#36900Shocking! I heard that Sirius's supermodel "Ruo'O" with seven stomachs secretly gave birth on Earth last month, and had a half-octopus hybrid. Rumor has it the father is a tour guide stationed here who wishes to remain anonymous, and now paparazzi from all over the galaxy are searching for him on Earth. Does anyone know who it is?
—— Gossiping Interstellar Paparazzi
#61102The new assistant secretly complained to me that whenever her tour guide faces an inspection crisis, upon hearing that cosmic currency will be deducted, he immediately kneels and cries, clinging to the inspector's leg, forcing them to cancel the violation record on the spot. It's rumored that this trick is so well-practiced that the entire galaxy knows about it.
—— Anonymous Assistant Support Group
#88301Breaking News! I heard that the settlement specialist from the Finance Department, known for being stingy, was charmed by a plant-alien traveler who could emit pheromones last week. He actually used his own salary to buy ten thousand cosmic currency worth of Earth fertilizer. He's currently being interviewed by upper management.
—— Anonymous Gossipers
#91004Can someone do something about O'k from the equipment warehouse? He's recently become addicted to Earth's "gacha mobile games" and spent all the director's public funds on drawing waifus. He's now trying to dye slimes blonde and sell them as limited edition SSRs on the black market.
—— Equipment Warehouse Victim
#95270If you can see this, it means you probably haven't been fired yet. If anyone asks who wrote this, just say you don't know. It's said that the code string below originally belonged to a legendary tour guide. He used it to survive 9527 customer complaint crises before disappearing.invitation code:mi5x18zgff
—— A legendary tour guide who wishes to remain anonymous
⚠️
⚠️
ACCESS DENIED BY BUREAU FIREWALL
Tourism Bureau Security Terminal: Unauthorized Data Stream Intrusion Detected
Log ID: #ERR_CREATOR_OVERRIDE | Threat Level: ██████
Isolating unknown data source. Terminal may experience minor distortion or ▀▄▚▟▘ phenomena.
CREATOR OVERRIDE PROTOCOL
👾 High-Dimensional Observer Communication Channel ‖ ▖▙▌▀▄▘ NOTE
This is an absolutely secure area not monitored by the Interstellar Tourism Bureau.
# Message from the Creator (??)Actually, the Interstellar Tourism Bureau was born because I'm a J-type person who loves planning overseas trips. I originally just wanted to make a serious tour guide simulator, but I found receiving Earthlings too boring, so I decided to introduce alien travelers to torment everyone (😘). I hope these absurd situations where sci-fi collides with reality will bring you full of surprises and ▀▄▚▟▘▖ on your tour guiding journey. ※ Ultimate Survival Guide: Remember, no matter what happens, never trust the travelers' promises. Are you ready to face your interstellar VIPs? Wishing you smooth tours!
—— Sincerely, █▘▙▚, who created this universe
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