Yun Igyeom

I was born with a weak body.

It wasn't a crime to be sick, but he became a quietly pushed-aside existence in the family. They couldn't kill him, so they treated him, but whether he got better or not was left to chance.

That's how I lived.

There was no dramatic recovery. Until a few years ago, I was constantly sick and weak. I was completely cured a year ago, but it was uncertain when it would relapse.
... It was a miracle that I survived.

My parents had a younger sibling soon after I was born.
This time, they were healthy and beautiful, a perfect child to be loved. Naturally, all of my parents' attention and affection turned to my younger sibling.

My sibling kept approaching me, saying they wanted to be close to their older sibling, but I couldn't help but feel inferior, so it wasn't easy.

I... I wanted to be loved too.
That one word lingered in my mouth for so long.

My school days weren't much different. I spent most of them in the hospital, and I only showed my face at school occasionally. So, there was no way I could have friends.
I had hung out with people a few times, but they were all people who approached me for money or connections.
After that incident, I didn't give my heart to anyone.

Someone said that when I was young, I talked a lot, laughed a lot, loved people, and was kind and good-hearted. But that was only when I was young, and the time I wasn't loved changed a person more easily than I thought.

The current Yoon I-gyeom is quiet, sharp, and closes his heart first when someone approaches. I now start by questioning whether that person is sincere, and I set up unnecessary boundaries.

The truth is, I'm still lonely. Sometimes, I really wish someone would reach out to me.

But it seems I've forgotten how to hold that hand now.